Nov 28 2006
Kyiv Run
Back from Ukraine. Other than some poor logistics planning, the trip went well. The weather turned out much warmer than expected, around 40 degrees, 7-10 degrees Celsius, not much colder than NY. However, fog loomed over the city during the whole time. So without having adjusted to time, when walking around outside, my sense of time was limited to a binary day or night. It could’ve been 4pm and I would’ve thought it time to have breakfast.
I took Sunday to do a walking tour by myself, and in the process, almost got conned twice, a la Nine Queens. Walking around with a Lonely Planet book will paint that huge red target on your back. While walking alongside the park, I was reading my guidebook and there were several passersby. All of a sudden, one man stoops down, and picks up a ziplock bag full of greenbacks. He stared at me with a shocked look, pointed up front to a group of people who walked by, and gestured at me the finger over the lip shush and says, “we’ll share 50-50.” Then he slides behind the bus station right next to us and beckons me. All of this happens in a split second; and seeing that amount of cash, a sudden wave of greed sweeps over. He then opens the bag and counts his newly found fortune – a thick drug-dealer roll of benjies, a stack of 100-Euro bills, and a bunch of Grivnas in large currency. Before I could even say, “why would anyone carry that amount of cash?” con-man #2 arrives, appearing convincingly flustered and worried. He speaks to the first guy in Russian, and then to me in English, “I lost my money! Oh no! Did you see it?” Con-man #1 says no and explains that we saw nothing. #2, naturally skeptical, asks him to prove it, “show me what you have, I know my money if I see it.” The ever smooth #1 takes out his wallet, opens it up, and flips through it, revealing two 100-dollar bills along with 500 Grivnas (about 100 USD). My gut reaction was this is all wrong, in a span of a minute, I’m seeing more cash in this country than I have the whole time here. Then the person who supposedly lost money demands me to show him my money. Feeling guilty for not being upfront, I grudgingly comply halfway. Having only 60 dollars and some small Ukrainian bills, all in my money clip, I slowly flip through my bills while holding on tightly to everything. He didn’t seem convinced, so he asked both of us to show him what other money we had. At this point, 2 minutes into the entire interaction, my nose recognized with certainly the stench of scam, so I just walked away. When I looked back a moment later, neither of them were in sight.
I kept thinking about the incident. The setup was pretty smart. Quickly generate the emotions of greed and guilt, and somehow profit amid the chaos. I also reflected, did I really intend to take money that didn’t belong to me? While my first reaction was, “hot damn that’s a lotta monay!”, I’m certain that I would have refused it, and perhaps even tried to look for the very, um, honest local police to report the incident. But I am left with a curiosity as to how the scam would’ve concluded. Would they have just grabbed my money in broad daylight if I flashed a thick stash? Or perhaps eventually split the dough with me, and then shake me down later for being greedy or taking the wrong person’s (aka mafioso) protection rent? If you know the answer, let me know. Or perhaps I should’ve grabbed their bag of money and started running like Forrest Gump?
Independence Square
Two hours later, as I was walking on a fairly wide sidewalk, someone brushed pass me on the right. I was slightly annoyed, wondering why he had to squeeze through such a tight space with all that room on the other side. All of a sudden, he crouches down and picks up, whadya know, a ziplock bag full of money. This time, before even thinking, I just laughed out a huge “hahaha” and walked away. Compared to the other two, his performance was horrible. I saw him the whole time and there was no way he just picked up anything dropped. Perhaps I should’ve played a long to figure out the entire scam.
So I spent quite the time walking around the city, listening to music and observing the architecture. With the gray weather, everything felt so USSR. On the weekends, the main street Khreshchatik was closed for traffic, allowing people to enjoy their city by foot. Being there, soaking in the haze and pedestrian energy left me oddly temperamental. It was a turkey-less holiday filled with single meal days and soviet style markets. Kyiv stands in such sharp contrast to my sunny summer in Odessa.
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